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This Review Reveals Minor Details About the Plot.

I Smell a Rat

Wild Things 2 on IMDb

Plot Overview

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Royal FlushFlorida schoolgirl Brittney Havers (Susan Ward) honors her late mother's (Kathy Neff) final resting place off Gator Alley. A year ago her mom had taken “a long drive off a short pier” after discovering her husband's penchant for skirts (“He's seen more pussy than an animal shelter.”) Brittney's step­father Niles Dunlap (Anthony Denison) boasts serious wealth giving her pride of place as a senior at elite Blue Bay High, but her slow-to-graduate nemesis Maya King (Leila Arcieri) regards her as “trailer trash” for her mom's humble origins. The seniors attend a rally where their Principal Mosster (Michael Chieffo) has them addressed by Detective Michael Morrison (Linden Ashby) & Coroner Julian Haynes (Joe Michael Burke) about the dangers of excess: drugs, alcohol, and partying too hard. Of course there's a party. Booze gets poured. Tops come off. Frat boys show up. And later that night so does nasty Puerto Rican crime figure Cicatriz (Ski Carr) to motivate Mr Dunlap to cough up his gambling debts.

jet pilotDunlap's private plane goes down the following day. His will cuts out his step­daughter but provides hand­somely for any blood relative. Maya comes forth claiming to be his illegitimate daughter, provoking a cat fight with Brittney. Insurance investigator Terence Bridge (Isaiah Washington)—a black straining at his leash—starts asking uncomfortable questions. There's a possibility of both inheritance and insurance fraud, in which case we do have two handy, non-white out-of-towners for fall guys.


hand crank ice cream makerTwo conflicts emerge intimated by (Prov. 30:33) “Surely the churning of milk bringeth forth butter, and the wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood: so the forcing of wrath bringeth forth strife.” The idea in the proverb is that a state of peace and conciliation can change to one of conflict just as a liquid (milk) can change to solid (butter) through constant agitation (churning.) Or hit a critical area (nose) and it bleeds. The latter is illustrated in the movie when Mr Dunlap is sporting a bloody nose after the Cuban roughs him up—the editors even passed over some eye-candy to make room for his bloody closeup. The lesson is applicable to Brittney who is sensitive about her past (“You can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl.”) When her partner in crime wants to cut into her profits, she retaliates (“I want my share!”) right quick.

high ballA constant aggravation can lead to a sudden counterstrike just like milk turning into butter. Such changes of form are played to the hilt here. We have a beach volley­ball game where the ball is batted back and forth over the net until the tie-breaker when it's spiked and then the sandy pitch gets mobbed. Cicatriz punches Dunlap in the gut, right – left – right, followed by a slap, a gun in his face, and a threat that he will take it out on his whole family if he doesn't get paid when he returns. Bridge criticizes the coroner for smoking cancer sticks that will eventually kill him, who then replies that every­body dies some­time. Dr. Haynes explains a DNA paternity test in court: “Take the bone marrow and grind it into little pieces and then you add in some dye elements and some chemicals and you put that all into an agarose gel.” The sample strands must be chemically multiplied to get enough to test. Wine ferments over time, sugar turning into alcohol and mold adding flavor. Cellar rats gnaw on the corks and then get to the wine. They end up in a fuselage where they eat through insulation to expose control wires. Then it's curtains for the plane. A parachute gets packed into a tight bundle, and when the rip cord is pulled, fabric spills out floating on air. When an armed redneck confronts a suspicious looking black man at night, a nervous Bridge pulls out his investigator business cards and hands one over after several drop to the ground. He's had “eleven years of cutting checks to ass­holes in wheel chairs who later are dancing a jig in Maui.” He's taken all the abuse (“the rich get richer”) he will take. “Now it's payback time.”

Production Values

” Video (2004) was directed by Jack Perez. It was written by Ross Helford and Andy Hurst. It stars Susan Ward and Leila Arcieri. The hand­some cast was pleasant to watch playing their non-demanding roles.

MPAA rated it R for strong sexuality, language and violence. The photography is amateurish in a two-dimensional kind of way. The music isn't enough to rescue the lack­luster screen. The cast are not given enough material to make sense of. The dolls are young and gorgeous if some­what vacuous. The editors hadn't enough takes to choose from following a rushed 21 days of shooting.

Review Conclusion w/a Christian's Recommendation

The director characterizes this film as straddling the knife edge between camp and melo­drama. It's self-aware having the audience on. It gallops from one trope to another ignoring necessary plot development. Then when it comes to iconic moments, it lingers a while. After squeezing in all the heavily-borrowed scenes one could ever wish for into a scant 1½ hours, continuity be damned, the credits roll. Running along­side them are all the scenes needed for the movie to make sense. Thank you, director. But wait! There is one final, royal plot twist. And if that isn't enough, we are left with the open-ended feeling that there are more sequels to come. One of the survivors says to another over drinks, “They do make them strong here, don't they?” I'll drink to that.

Movie Ratings

Action factor: Decent action scenes. Suitability For Children: Not Suitable for Children of Any Age. Special effects: Wake up and smell the 1990s technology. Video Occasion: Good for Groups You Want to Mess With. Suspense: Keep a tight grip on the edge of your seat. Overall movie rating: Three stars out of five.